God is smiling on me

As I'm writing this post, I have a smile on my face.  I am so happy and encouraged by God.  He has been blowing me away in just how He is showing me He loves me.  If you don't know me, you would not understand the joy that I feel or the reason for it, so, I'm going to share with you about why I am so happy.  I have been a disciple of Christ (living my life by the Bible and using it as my standard for living) for 15 years this year.  I am 37 years old and I have been single, no boyfriend, for the past 8 or 9 years.  In this time, I've struggled up and down with wanting a boyfriend, but no one came.  That is until about 4 years ago.  I've known Joseph for a long time, but he started trying to court me (yes, I love the old ways of dating, the pure way, God's way) a couple of years ago, but neither one of us were mature at that point or ready.  We lost touch for 2 years and this past year we reconnected after some time.

I believe we reconnected for the following reason.  I prayed the following prayer: "Father, I know that you are the one who holds my heart in your hand.  You are my Father and I believe that you arrange relationships, just like the people in India and other places do, because, you know who is best for me.  I don't know, so, I need you to take my heart and give it to the man you feel will protect it and represent your love for me here on this earth.  Father, I trust you and know that you will give it to the man that you find is worthy of having my heart. I'm not going to ask you for any signs cause I always get confused in that, but you know what I need to see to know that it was you.  In Jesus name, Amen"

And I left it and went about my Father's business.  I didn't worry about a man or who it's going to be anymore.  I surrendered it to my Father and kept focused on helping other women know Him.  That is my heart, my single focus.  I love my Father and I have come to the conclusion that if it is just me and Him that is all I would need because He is my portion and I do not want drama.  Anyway, a couple of weeks later several people started mentioning Joe to me and how encouraging he was.  Different people who I know did not conspire together to say "let's get Melika to start thinking about Joe."  No!  This was the work of my Father and I could see it.  Then, Joe, out of no where, asked me on a date to go to his sister's birthday party.  I was so nervous and shocked because we hadn't had a date in 2 years and now our first date is to a family's celebration.  OMG! That was nerve recking to me.  Anyway, I prayed and my Father helped me to see that it was ok and I could trust him and be vulnerable when we talked during our drive to New Jersey.  It was one of my best dates ever.

After that, I prayed, "God, I'm feeling something.  I wonder if he is too.  Allow him to mention it to me first."   A day or so later, he called me to tell me he liked me and then I could tell him I felt the same.  ( I know, I'm so cheesy.  My siblings tell me that all the time, but I like stuff like this.)
From there, we set up boundaries in how much we would talk and we planned dates and we were doing this for a couple of months.  In this time, I was struggling with fear and trusting if this is from God, but, I had to let go of my fear and trust God.  I could now see the different things His hands were doing because I know none of this is of my doing.  I started to feel anxious because I was really liking him and not knowing where he was leading the relationship.  I was talking to my girlfriends about him and everything.  Anyway, last night, we had a date and as we were walking down the street, he turned to me and said that he has dated many women but he doesn't want to go on any of the dates anymore because he just thinks about me, so, he asked me at that point to be his girlfriend.  I said I would think about it.  (I know, I was wrong, but I like teasing him.)  He gave me 10 reasons why he wants me to be his girlfriend and he read it to me before I gave him my answer.  I was blown away.  I am blown away.  God is amazing and I am grateful that I am waiting on Him because He always knows what is best.