Like little Children

I love the holidays and the time that I get to spend with my family.  I love going home to Arkansas, sitting around laughing and talking with them.  Every year, we always cook a LOT of food and I'm usually the first one finished because I eat in spurts and get full to fast.  I love my mom's cooking.  I am so grateful for her.  My favorite memories are with her in the kitchen and helping her make her sweet potatoes pies, a multitude of cakes, and lemon pies. I can't wait to see my nieces and nephews, especially the little ones.  We love to sit and watch them open their gifts and play with them.  It reminds us of the period in our lives when we were kids and did the same thing.  They are so excited with whatever the gifts are and they instantly began to play with them.  Grateful.  That's the word.  I've been thinking a lot about that and examining my life, my heart.  Am I grateful for my life and where God has me?  I go back and forth with that and with the new year coming I always reflect on what I did or didn't do and where I want to go in the new year and how I want to get there.  Even with all of the thinking and planning, I still can not figure out my life or move forward unless my Father says so.  I have been grumbling in my heart about not being where I want to be in my life.  You may wonder, what are you trying to do about it?  Sometimes, that mindset can frustrate you more because you think its your abilities that will move you out and you miss that it's not only about your abilities but about God's will.  I want to be in God's will, but I think for a period of time, I've been walking in Melika's will. I have been unwilling to let go of what I want, how I want it and when I want it.  It's like my fist have been clutched on this idea of what I think my life could be and anything other than that is not good.  This thought is foolish.  In reality, when I think like this(and I know I am not by myself in this), I am saying that I know better about my life than anyone (God) does.  Wow, the pride in that.  That is scary.  God is  the creator of us all and as His children, He knows what He has designed our lives to be.  We forget that we are His children and start living like adults(making our own decisions based on what we want to do with our lives without consulting our Father to see if it is what He wants to do with our lives and when things don't work out the way we hoped they would, we blame Him even though it was a decision we made without His guidance.)
As, children, and that is who we really are, our Father wants us to approach Him like children.  We are the clay and He is the potter molding us in who we were created to be.  Jesus says that in order to enter His Kingdom, we must be like little children.  Like my little niece and nephew on Christmas day, we have to be grateful for the gifts our Father give us no matter what the gifts are because everything He gives is out of love.  Also, like little children, we have to trust that our Father has the best in mind for us and will not harm us so we can trust our lives to Him.  This is the thought that I am walking in these days and hopefully this will help you if you are like me and like to know what's to come and handle everything on your own. We need to just chill out and rest in God.  He has us.